NoSugar! NoSpice!











{July 4, 2012}   Rambling++

What is possessiveness? Is it healthy at all?? Is their any thin line existing btw care and obsession? Or is the line so thin that both of these keep bumming into each other.

When do you know that a normal camaraderie has turned into a craze.. pleasant hang-outs moved on to a constant need and want of sharing your life with the other person. Actually when do you know its time to stop.. that it has started interfering with the pre-existing folks in your life.

Or are we over-playing things here.. do things phase out with time? I mean yeah if its love, it would last. If its as strong, may be other relations are supposed to phase out. Dragging them is anyways not worthy enough.

Thats why they say the earlier the friendship starts in life, the better it is. The logic behind this according to me is – a young mind doesnt judge orΒ  analyze much. Things happen gradually and the friendship grows – the relation grows with the two persons, their changing nature and life-styles.

On the other hand, for us grown-ups.. we twist and turn friendship acc to our needs. There is too much adjustment needed.

While the previous case is like a painting still getting flashed with colors, the later is a hard-coded frame where we want to just fit faces. The ever-so-increasing and pushing desire to have a perfect fit makes us border on insanity, craze and expectations leading to disappointments and frustration.

P.S – If I read back what I wrote, I will be disgusted at my own self.. there should be some decorum attached to rambling as well.. but looks like I have lost it! πŸ˜€

 



{June 15, 2012}   Before I start …

Before I start writing about anything, there is so much reference to context needed. Anyways..

Why is to so difficult to see someone suffering? Why is it that I cant be apathetic towards many people who created a havoc in my beautiful dream-like life. Why does the thought of asking about their well-being, wishing their well-being and doing something to make them feel better dawn upon me every now and then? Why is it that I am so forgiving but not forgetting! Why is that it feels that everyone can live happily together? Why am I mean to my loved ones, harsh to them and expect them to be ideal and at the same time keep a huge margin for others to falter?

Its just not done. Its so uncool!

It seems that love is not forgiving at all.. the more you love a person, the more you constraint him and keep building apprehensions regarding him. For people who are new in your life.. there is always a scope of them being better than the obvious. Also, there is not much of a fear of losing.. we allow them to be less than perfect, they can be infidel, mean or cold towards you but the one you can die for – you suffocate him every day because you just cant let him go. Love infuses selfishness … the need and want to stay in the same socially accepted and applauded relationship makes you go blind. Yes Love is indeed blind.. it blurs your vision. You stop seeing a person as an individual.. you just look at him as an object in your life. May be its like a bird in a cage whom Id feed the best, play with and buy things for .. but only till she doesnt flutter her wings and try to move out. The moment she does, the fear/anxiety/insult of losing her will overpower all rationalities and I will cage her even more strongly.

-contd-

Its amazing how easy it is to lie and convince yourself that it was for the greater good and how killing it is to be lied to. So in both the cases, what eventually prevails is the lie – to self or others! Is life supposed to go like this? Is everyones’ like this. Are there a definite set of unsaid rules and assumptions we are supposed to live by? The rule of accepting a little distance in all relations, the rule of seeing and ignoring, the rule of knowing and not saying, feeling and not expressing, expecting but not dreaming an Utopia.. I guess now I am just rambling.

After all this confusions and dilemmas and fighting with the inner demons – there is one fact which stands tall still. I have the most honest life-partner ever! He is strong enough to admit the imperfections in himself, us and this world on the whole.Β  Any aberrations in his attitude if any…have been caused by the intense pressure and tension created by me. But he still held his ground.

I wish I had the faith he possesses..actually I had it, I want to regain it. We have been perfect, are so perfect that it became too heavy a burden to carry. I guess a little loosening is all whats needed. I guess we just need to Move It, Move It… Move it, Move it! πŸ™‚

 

 

 

 



{June 14, 2012}   Hello blogsville!

Here goes a Hii! the second one. The last one did’nt last too long πŸ™‚ Better luck this time SS. Oh yes! SS is my name – SugarSpice i.e. πŸ˜›

I spent some time ..no.. a lot of time deciding the theme and color of this blog. So the hottie at the right side hardly resembles me except for the hair style πŸ˜€ But I like what she is wearing and hopefully once in this lifetime – I’ll have a bod worth this dress and pose πŸ™‚ Amen!!

I have a life many envy … Id like to keep it that way but Shit happens! but then it gets washed out as well πŸ™‚

I am a bundle of joy for my friends and family, its too difficult and so un-cool not being the same that I end up burying a lot many surges of emotions beneath a heap of giggles and smiles. So thats how the saga starts …

 

Gdnight!

SS



et cetera